Sinking in Six Days

September 20, 2018

There is a disaster and a catastrophe beyond our imagination waiting to happen, and when it does, the world as we know it will never be the same.  

Are we talking about what Harvard biologist George Wald claimed in 1970 that “civilization will end within 15 or 30 years unless immediate action is taken against problems facing mankind”? (Spoiler alert… it didn’t.)

No.  Not that prediction.  

Nor was Paul Ehrlich’s prediction that he wrote in 1968 “The battle to feed all of humanity is over. In the 1970’s and 1980’s, hundreds of millions of people will starve to death.”  OK, so his book, The Population Bomb, had some miscalculations.  But surely he was correct when he said: “If I were a gambler, I would take even money that England will not exist in the year 2000.” 

I’m pretty sure Her Majesty, age 92, is fighting to outlive Mr. Ehrlich, age 86, just so she can get one last chuckle… 

OK- 0 for 2, but when Ted Danson in 1989 said the oceans will all die within 10 years… Nope.  Not that, either.  Is there a pattern here? A pattern of hyperbole and fear-mongering?  

NO THERE IS NOT.  And this next doomsday prediction may still come true, and we will know for sure within a week.  For on September 26, 1988, it was predicted the Maldives would be under water in 30 years.  THIS IS NOT A JOKE. STOP LAUGHING.  We have 7 days to rescue all the people and the living creatures.  Call Noah and have him build another Ark.  Bring out the Coast Guard. Send all the boogie boards and floaties you can find for the Maldives is going down in 7, 6, 5, 4… 

God help us.